You better believe

You better believe that it could happen. Everyone loves a Cinderella story, but this one could shatter that glass slipper. Up against the Juggernaut 5 time Superbowl winning Steelers, the first time Cardinals could in fact, shock the world. We could be more than a state with a big hole in the ground and a bunch of cacti.

4:15 AZ kickoff time, you know where I'll be and what I'll be doing. One more game, sixty more minutes of playtime, one chance for first time destiny.

I may become a religious man Sunday morning, because I may be doing a lot of praying and praising.

Time to fly red birds, fly.

Choppers

I decided to take a first step to a better me this year by going into the dentist for the first time in 2 years. Did I ever get a wake up call. Before I go into it, let me throw out a special shout out to my old dentist. I hope that you go play in traffic today. How did you get your dental degree? I should have known something was up with him when all he had in his office was scuba diving magazines and framed pictures of white tigers in space scenes with glitter. My new dentist was amazed. He'd never seen a person get 11 cavities in 2 years and not have good cleanings done previously.

So that's what's in store for me, 11 cavities including 1 root canal and 1 crown, then a deep cleaning and 1 bridge to be done. Over $6000 worth of grill work.

Damn, that's a new Kia compact car. Let me also thank my insurance for restructuring their plan wherein I only get $1000 worth of coverage per year before its all out of pocket. Oh and I'm paying $53 a month for it. And in March the premium is being raised. Looks like I'll be cancelling coverage in March, assholes.

I had my first set of fillings last Weds. Turns out he couldn't salvage one tooth without a root canal, so next Weds I have that fun task to be done. Because of the root canal, I need a crown. Then I get the rest of my fillings done. I should have started work in December, because then I would have another $1000 to play with. Now I'm screwed.

Well, maybe on the plus side, I'll drop some weight because of the lack of use of my mouth over the next few months, and whatever I spend on medical bills can be used as a tax write off.

My state of my union address 2008

2008. 365 days of uncertainty. I can tell you one thing, i wish the best for 2009, as a year of needed change. At the onset of 2008, I set out to have the year be a year of personal test, to challenge my meddle, to which I pretty much did nothing with.

I took time off work for personal reasons, spent time racking my bipolar brain over issues and came up with no answers to any questions I posed to myself. 2009 must, I emphasis MUST be different or else I will once again settle into mediocrity and repetition and ultimately start to whither away into middle age with no insight or fights for my own future. Personal goals need to not only be set, but met with vigor. Laziness and personal habits must not be only controlled, but eradicated from my daily life. Life must be embraced, as with being alive one must not forget to remember how to actually "live".

Now for my reflections on 2008.

finances- 6.5 down 2.2

I am stable, but at a loss from last year. The country's and world markets struggles definitely affect home. My major govt. accounts are down 15k in some accounts. All my stocks are in the red. I am accruing little to no interest in other accounts. Nothing grows. I am not hurting for personal expenses, although if I were to lose work, I'd be in a bad spot. Regardless, despite a country and market in recession, I still force myself to put something away every month, even if its twenty bucks or a few coin rolls. I force myself to add investment shares in a floundering market knowing that it will rebound one day and my down time investments will pay off two times over.

work 5 no change

Work is the same. There is always bullshit drama to deal with between other employees. Thankfully it has nothing to do with me. It still wears on me to hear it everyday. People still kiss bosses asses, don't pull their weight and dump it off on me to do extra, people screwing other employees like a town bicycle, and a general side separation of malaise that pits a majority of co-workers against a few bad seeds which makes for a disgruntled environment. Why do I put up with it then? One reason-money. In times of financial and employment hardships, people fall back on sin vices-booze, sex, cigarettes and guns. We supply two out of four, which may lead to the sex part. Obviously we don't sell guns. We've seen an influx of consumers who make themselves feel better by drinking. I'll gladly take their cash. Now is not the best time to look for a new job anyways. Every week there are thousands of layoffs. I've had 50+yr old men come in to ask for jobs, which is a morbid sign. For the timebeing, I'll keep my tax free income and rouse my fathers interest with income property, which needs to be the next move.

Social life- 4.5 down 2

I couldn't tell you the last time I went out to Scottsdale to party. I've been sticking around to the house and walking to the local bar a few blocks away more so. I'm not going to risk a DUI, nor spend all that cash in going uptown. It's saved me money in the past few months to stay home and have people over. I've lost touch with a few friends, split off a few and strengthened older friends. Still though, I only have a few good friends that I can count on one hand. I don't get invited out to anything, which sometimes is a blessing, but disheartening when it doesn't happen. I'm thankful for those I have around me though. I look forward to networking a bit more this year.

Love life- 7

Still, like last year, not of your concern. My joys, heartaches and concerns are not of your business.

Spirituality- 4 +.5

I am a little more open to the topic of spirituality. I still am not an active follower of anything, but the topic is interesting to me. The origins of various beliefs, dogmas, and personal decisions to what people do in their faiths. Histories and myths, controversies and stories relating to any religious topic spur my interest. There may not be an active faith that I follow, but I am leaning more towards the idea that there is something greater than all of humanity and the universe out there as there are questions that I have arose to myself that have a hard time or cannot be answered by normal means.

Family 8.5 no change

This year I spent more time with my immediate family than I had in years. I took time off work and went home for a few weeks at a time and spent a good amount of time trying to rebond with some issues. My family had two cousins get engaged, and one divorce, so I guess that cancels out. I went home and had a great time for my father's 70th birthday. As added incentive to further the cause in 2009, we as a family are taking our first family vacation and their first real vacation in 15 years when we go to Kauai in March. At Christmas time I spent more time with my parents instead of ditching them to hang with the rest of the family. One of my cousins had a tough time but she fought through it. My other became prosperous and a small bit closer to me. I hope 2009 will be good to all of us.

Health 5 down 1

I'm officially starting to feel and look my age. Mostly to my own faults.Correction, to all my faults. I can't tell you the last time I worked out. I've gained too much weight. I'm winded very easily and have lost strength. I've started 2009 by going to the dentist for the first time in 2 years to have $6000 worth of work needed to be done. I have habits and laziness that need to be curbed and eliminated or things will start to get worse. I'm still good at not getting sick, but that will only last so long. My diet is well enough, but as always, I eat too much. It doesn't matter that I eat decently most of the time, even good food can hurt in excess.

I need to watch my drinking. I can't recover well as I did in my twenties. I still only really party one day a week, but its hardcore when it happens, which explains why Mondays suck so bad. Plain and simple, even though its in my blood and my history, I need to be aware of liquor in my life as not a good thing when I'm drinking it, but as a bad thing as a whole.

No major illnesses, broken bones or accidents this year.

Total- 5.75 down .75

Things mostly sank this year, for the second year in a row. Its a sign that some kind of change is needed. I'm not worried about finances and my job. Those are things that can be mode more of or replaced. I'm more concerned with my own person as a whole. I'm letting myself go, and slip into numbing routines and dulling lifestyles again. It's my flaw. As I get older it gets tougher to crank myself out of funks and jumpstart motivations. I somehow need to find new ways, force myself out of those downgrades and to get back on track. I need to saddle up a new horse and put the old one down and make glue out of it to make sure new things stick.

Changing tides?

As per a yearly tradition during the last gasps of 2008 or the first breaths of 2009, I usually give my "state of Marc's Union" address that lays out what has been going on in various aspects of my life over the past year. I still have to put it all together and place it out on the computer, so yes, it is being worked on. It still is residing in a bit of stagnant laziness as usual though. The ninth year of the second millennium needs to be, and already has been a year of changes. Personally, financially, nationally and emotionally. We have a new president, a first black president at that. Personally though, I have other importances. Our very own Cardinals will try to make history on February first. I know where I'll be, yelling and bawling. Shock the world, yes we can.

There should be a vast array of changes this year to come. My parents and I will be going on their first real vacation and our first family vacation in 15 years in March. I may travel to new places after as well, foreign and domestic.

Jobs may change, prosperity may ensue. Properties may be bought and sold. Friends may be added or lost, but god forbid the latter.

Keep around for something new.

I'm moving to Luxembourg

New year's Eve is always one of the toughest holidays to work as a bartender. In Arizona, we can't drink on the job, even though I know some that do religiously. I never had the desire to do so anyways in my years of service. So we can't partake in that aspect. It's actually a good thing that we can't. Having a clear mind helps me service the drunkards out there, and especially on this night. As predicted, it was pretty slow until about 10:30pm when we got incredibly busy all at once. It stayed that way until closing.
My new year started by making drinks. Two stoli vanilla vodkas and diet coke to be exact. No celebrations, no well wishes, hugs, handshakes, or hugs and kisses from loved ones. It felt very cold and disheartening. The irony of it was that I was surrounded by hundreds of people, but never felt so lonely before. I saw everyone stop what they were doing out on the floor to hug and kiss eachother, shake hands and be happy. I received my first well wish for the new year ten minutes after the fact, followed by a few more. Well after midnight Crystal came back and we gave eachother a hug and a kiss. I wished she was first.
After work closed, we disassembled the cursed Christmas decorations plastered all over the bar, cleaned up and was actually done in record time. Usually we leave around 5:30am on this day, but we were done at 3:30am.
I drove home, ate a few bites of leftover ribs and went to bed. I had a dream that I was moving to Luxembourg. For $6000 a year, I would rent out a large loft flat in a small town in the country. I started to learn the language and make friends with the people living in the lofts above and next to me. The countryside was gorgeous, alpine, green and cool. It was a change, a well needed one.
Subconsciously, I think my mind was planting seeds about what may need to happen for the new year. I don't know if it means a new job or anything else, but I think it means a change may come, or is needed.